Avoid These Mistakes If You Want To Get Your Ex Back

When you first get dumped there are a whole myriad of emotions and thoughts running through your head. It is natural to feel depressed and desperate but you do not want to let these feelings take over as it could spell disaster for your future chances of getting back your ex.

It is common for your ex to act cold or indifferently towards you in the aftermath of your separation, unfortunately this only makes you feel worse and confused because they are acting like a completely different person to who you know them as. 

So what do you do if they are ignoring you, aren’t returning your phone calls and seem as though they have moved on already without you? That is a good question and something that we are going to tackle here. So keep on reading to find out what you should not be doing that will push them away from you. You will also learn some proven strategies that will regain their interest and spark off attraction for you again, so let’s get going!

Break ups are hard and you will probably be going through crushing pain right now. Of course it is healthy to take some personal time to wallow in your sadness. You are not a robot and you have to deal with what has just happened. Do not allow this to go on too long though as it will have a negative impact on your chances of getting your ex back again.

The Good News – Yes, There Is Some!

There is some good news in all of this. There are a few ways that you can get your ex back, no matter what happened in your relationship. You just have to want it enough and have the motivation to put in a little bit of effort. I’m not going to lie to you and tell you that you will win them back tomorrow, the likelihood is that this will not happen, it may take a few weeks. It all depends upon your own situation.

However, you can speed up the process by putting certain techniques to work. When you see these techniques starting to work on your ex it will be fun to watch. There will be a big shift in how they interact with you and how they view you, so take heart, all hope is not lost yet.

You have an amazing advantage right now and that is knowledge. The more you know about the human mind and how we commonly react after a break up, the more you will be able to judge your own personal situation correctly and do and say all the right things to make your ex desire you again.

Think about it like this. You are good at certain things because you practice them a lot or you know a lot about the subject. Just like you could be an excellent flirt, you can also become effective in reversing a break up. Most people don’t have a clue where to start though as this was never taught to them in school or anywhere else. In fact, friends and family can end up giving you incredibly damaging advice. It’s not their fault though, they were never taught these things either. 

The Importance Of Timing

Even if you find yourself on the right path and making progress with your ex, the sad fact is that if you stay on this same path for too long it can end up pushing them away. You see, you have to understand the importance of timing here. People can be impatient and will soon move on if they have to jump through too many hoops to get you back. In the same way they can quickly lose interest if you are not quick enough.

Be aware though that there is a natural progression to getting your ex back, if you rush full steam ahead in desperation it will put them off you for good and make them want to stay as far away from you as possible. There is obviously a fine line that you need to walk to make your efforts successful. Don’t worry though, you are going to learn all about what to do and the mistakes that you should be avoiding.

You have to know where to start first, so let’s take a look at some of the mistakes people usually make when trying to get their exes back. These should be avoided at all costs. If you have already made some or all of these mistakes never fear. There are specific things that you can do to make them forget all about them and make them view you in a positive light again. Please read through and learn these tips before you do anything else. This is your first step in making your ex want you back again. 

Avoid All Of These Mistakes If You Want To Get Back Together

This is probably the most crucial time after your break up. What you do and say here will determine where you are heading in terms of getting back together. You can end up saying and doing things that will drive your ex away from you and make them see you as unstable. I’m afraid that this is what most people end up doing in the initial stages of their break up because their emotions are running at an all time high. 

The problem here is that most people do not realize how important this stage is. They end up hitting out at their ex because they are angry and hurt. They often feel that they should be doing something to win back their love and start making serious errors in judgement because of this. It is a desperate time and the more they try to win them back, the worse their situations seem to become. 

There is a reason for this and it is all based on timing. You can’t just expect for your ex to take you back immediately after they broke up with you. This wouldn’t make sense as they obviously has good reasons for doing so. You have to give them some space to work out what they want and if you are behaving in a desperate and highly volatile manner, it will just reinforce that they made the right decision to break up with you in the first place.  

Too Much Contact With Your Ex

When you are constantly contacting your ex by phone, text or email they will start to view you in negative terms. Think about it and imagine if the situation was reversed and your ex was the one that was trying to contact you all of the time. What would you think? You might be flattered the first few times, but it would soon get boring and tedious if you were getting texts every day that didn’t really say anything important. You would think that your ex is not moving on and that they are still hung up on you. That is exactly what your ex is thinking now. 

This is why you have to STOP. I know that this sounds harsh and that you think that it is impossible to not contact your ex, but this is exactly what you have to do if you want to get them back in the future. Your ex will not be attracted to someone who is needy or who can’t seem to function on their own. They will never miss you either if you are always around and asking questions. That is a key element of making your ex want you back – making them miss you. Try to keep this is in the forefront of your mind when you are struggling with no contact. Always stop and think about how it will look to your ex.

If your ex knows that you are still around waiting for them, they know that they can get you back whenever you want. You will be left dangling for an extended period of time not knowing where you stand. This is not the kind of situation that you want to find yourself in. Your self respect will take a nose dive and your ex will also lose respect for you. Only by disappearing completely, can your ex see what they are missing. You have to make your ex miss you like crazy if you want them back and they cannot do that if you are always there.

Using Threats And Ultimatums

Again, you have to stop and think about how all of your actions will look to your ex. If you threaten your ex with something, they will either laugh in your face for being pathetic, or they will resent your aggressiveness. When you are unreasonable this is when the trouble starts. If your ex broke up with you then they don’t really owe you anything anymore – cruel but true. By trying to hold onto something that is gone, you will only make yourself look desperate and needy. Your ex will see you as crazy and they will try to avoid you at all costs. Let your ex go for a while. Think of it as a temporary measure to get the end result that you want. It will require a lot of willpower on your end, but it is worth it.

When you try to use guilt trips out of desperation your ex may stick around for a while, but not because they want to. Is this the kind of relationship that you really want? You want someone to be with you out of choice. Not only will guilt trips make you feel kind of crap about yourself in the long run, they will also make your ex resent you and the control that you have over their lives. Ultimately this will end in heart break for you because you CANNOT make someone stay with you out of pity.

Be Careful About What You Say To Your Ex

You have to keep in mind that everything that you do or say after your break up is magnified in your ex’s eyes. This is because it is an emotionally charged time. They will remember everything you say to them because they are sensitive to you thoughts about them. So be careful about uttering things that you might later regret. Do not act before you think. That is a sound piece of advice and it can save a lot of heartache. You may have already made this mistake with your ex but it doesn’t mean it is the end for you.

This is a time when you are at your weakest emotionally and so many things will be going on in your mind that it is easy to lose sense of reality sometimes. Accept that this is a stage that you must go through after your break up, but deal with it in a mature way and do not allow your ex to see that you are taking it badly.

Never Stalk Your Ex

Now, if saying horrible and spiteful things to your ex wasn’t bad enough, stalking them will really ruin your chances of getting your ex back. I’m not talking about the kind of stalking where you creep up on them from behind and sit outside of their house with binoculars monitoring everything that they do (avoid this too please). What I’m talking about is cyber stalking or stalking them through his friends.

This is a very common method that people use after they have been dumped to keep an eye on what their ex is doing and how they are feeling after the break up. It is natural to want to know what they are up to and who they are doing it with, after all your ex was a huge part of your life and they suddenly aren’t there anymore.

What you have to bear in mind is that this will be doing you no good whatsoever. It can quickly become an obsession and take over every part of your life. You can also end up reading into things too much and it will end up hurting you even more. I have known people who have slowly lost all self respect in doing this. They check their ex’s Facebook wall every day for clues for over a year after the break up and they end up becoming mentally unwell and can’t move on. 

You have to remember that what your ex posts on Facebook is very different to the reality of how they are feeling. Think about it. We project an image of how we want things to be on Facebook. We seldom pour out our hearts on our walls for everyone to see, this is even more true for guys. They will want to portray an image of happiness to you and the outside world. Pride and fear of rejection will not allow them to look like they miss you. 

Don’t Beg Your Ex To Take You Back

This is a very common thing for people to do because they are grief-stricken and cannot imagine their life without their ex. You have to start to think about things from their perspective though. How will it look to them if you start asking to constantly give it another try? If you start crying and trying to guilt trip them into things it will only make them resent you even more and they will start to see you as pathetic. 

When you are miserable and desperate it is highly unattractive to your ex. Why would be want to be with someone who is weak and has no self respect? I know that this sounds harsh, but you have to understand that your ex will view your break up and behaviour completely differently. They have different priorities and will want someone that is composed and knows their own self worth. If you do not know how special you are and what you deserve in a relationship, how do you expect your ex to?

If you continue down this self destructive path you will only end up doing yourself more damage and making it almost impossible for your ex to ever see you in a positive light again. Let’s take a look at what people usually think after a break up. This should give you a big insight into what goes on in your ex’s mind and what you should not be doing.

What Your Ex Thinks When They Dump You

“Whenever I break up with someone I want space. I do not want to have to go over and over my reasons again and again about why I wanted to break up with them. It is embarrassing and awkward.”

“After I broke up with my ex I found it much easier to ignore them altogether. I just didn’t know what to say as I thought it would hurt them more if I continued to be friendly. Every time we spoke my ex wanted to meet up and asked if I would take them back. I couldn’t handle that.” 

I hate the drama of break ups. When your ex gets very resentful and bitter towards you there is no way that you want to be around them. Guilt trips are the worst. Exes have a knack of making you feel bad about the break up and turning everyone against you.” 

Do you see now that this kind of behaviour can make your ex glad that they broke up with you in the first place? The last thing that you want is for them to feel this way about you as it is just soul-destroying.

The best thing that you can do is not to force things. You want to avoid making things awkward between you both because it will discourage your ex from trying to initiate conversations with you. Give yourself and your ex some space initially so that you can work out your next moves and get your emotions in check.

Now that you have learned what you should not be doing, the next logical thing to do would be to learn what you should be doing to make them want you again and speed up your reconciliation. 

I Have Already Made These Mistakes – What Do I Do Now?

The good news is that it is not too late. The above advice may seem somewhat inappropriate if your break up happened a long time ago. It still helps to understand where you have gone wrong up to this point so that you can start to fix it, and fix it you can!

If you are still determined to get your ex back then you will have to take a step back, understand what you have been doing wrong and then start to immerse yourself in the psyche of the opposite sex. When you discover exactly what goes on in their head it will be a real eye opener for you. From there you can start to put yourself in a position of control again and follow a proven plan to win back their interest in you and begin to miss you. 

It is not too late to take action. There are certain detachment techniques that you can apply to make your ex know that you are ok with the break up and you accept it.

Even if you have not talked to your ex in a while this is still an extremely effective technique as it shows them that you are moving away from them and getting on with your life. This will throw your ex off balance and suddenly start to spark their interest in you again. This will ultimately open up the chance of reconciliation between you both when they realise that you could be slipping away from you for good.

Text Your Ex Back System goes into this in a lot more depth and give you the appropriate techniques to follow to get your ex’s attention and make them desire you again.

Your Next Steps

When your ex gets back in touch with you, you will need to know how to respond in a way that retains their interest and stokes their desire for you again. If you don’t pull this off properly, they will start to pull away from you again and move on.

Luckily Michael Fiore has come up with a proven plan that will ignite your ex’s passion for you and tell you exactly what you need to say to make them want you back again. The Text Your Ex Back System has featured on numerous high profile shows in the USA and he has helped thousands of couples to get back together by tapping into human psychology. You can instantly download the audio, video and manual system to put these techniques into practice when they contact you. You can also use these text examples to initiate contact with your ex again after a certain period of time, which Fiore explains himself. 
Certain specific messages can elicit emotions when used properly and at specific stages in the process. These uniquely special text messages can invoke intimate and personal reactions from your ex partner, and lead to the flames in your relationship getting reignited. This is where the Text Your Ex Back System comes in. The aim of the text your ex back program is to target positive memories that still remain strong in your ex partner which will bring back to the surface, feelings that may have been slowly drifting away.

Download The System Here