Why Did Your Ex Really Break Up With You? Find Out Now

There are many reasons why your ex may have broken up with you and you probably weren’t told the actual truth about why they decided to end things. Your ex probably wanted to spare your feelings and couldn’t face telling you what they really felt. They didn’t want to make an already painful situation worse or deal with the anger that you would hurl at them if you knew the real reasons. So is there any way that you will ever know why your relationship ended?

The answer to that is an emphatic YES! Although you cannot see inside this person’s head, there are common reasons that may have preepmted their decision to take such drastic action. You may have seen it coming or it could have hit you like a bolt from the blue. Whatever the case is, you have to look into your own personal situation and see if there were any clues that your ex was giving off prior to the split. Did they drop hints or did they seem unhappy for some time? 

When you do this it will be enlightening for you because there are lots of signs that you may not have been picking up on beforehand. Once you go over the weeks and months leading up to your split, you will find loads of things that you previously missed. This will help you to ascertain what the real reasons were for your ex’s decision. 

Below you will find some common reasons why people decide to call it a day with their partners. Perhaps some of these relate to you – think carefully about each one and try to work out if this was the real reason. Some of them are kind of depressing and you may think that these reasons spell the end of any chances you have of getting your ex back. This is NOT the case. Once you understand the truth about what caused your break up, you can go about fixing it properly. There is no point in patching something up with a sticking plaster if you still don’t really understand why you broke up in the first place. Another break up is likely to happen down the road if this is the case. 

The following points are no holes barred and honest insights into why your relationship ended. You may not like to hear some of them and they may cause you to reflect inwardly, but this is all for your own good in the end if you want your ex back or want your next relationship to last. It is important to remember though that just because you were broken up with, it does not necessarily mean that it is your fault. There is only so much that you can do to make a relationship work. If the other person is just not as invested in the relationship than you, nothing you can do or say will make it work.

So, if you are feeling that you are at fault or in some way lacking because your partner broke up with you, you have to stop that kind of negative thinking now. Sometimes people are incompatible and it is best to end a relationship that is unhealthy or going nowhere. That being said though, there are a lot of relationships that can be saved.

Did you think that this person was the one? Were you great together and you just don’t understand what happened? If this is the case then you have a real shot at making things work again, you just have to be careful about the way that you go about it. Let’s take a look at some of the reasons for your break up below so that you can go about fixing things and getting your ex back.

You Weren’t Paying Them Enough Attention

Relationships are a bit like children – they need nurturing, time and attention. Maybe you were a little distracted with work or family problems in the months and weeks leading up to your break up. Did you want to go out with your friends rather tan spending quality time with your partner? This won’t have gone unnoticed by your girlfriend or boyfriend. They maybe thought that they were the only ones trying to make the relationship work.

At the start of a relationship you are much more likely to be attentive to your significant other, you shower them with gifts or compliments and want to spend all of your spare time with them. They had all the attention that they could ever wish for. Over time though, this enthusiasm begins to wane and that is normal – no one can expect you to keep up with that kind of avid enthusiasm forever, real life just gets in the way. Your ex will have expected that too.

That doesn’t mean to say that you can’t put effort into your relationship anymore. Becoming complacent and thinking that you can’t do anything to improve your relationship is just lazy. Your ex maybe thought that this is what was happening and they couldn’t get you to take an interest in them anymore. This tends to get a little tedious and soul destroying after a while. If you are more interested in watching the tv, going out with friends or staying late at work, than talking to your partner, they will begin to think that they are unimportant and their happiness will take a nose dive.

Try to think back to how things were before the break up – were you guilty of doing any of these things? Did your partner seem unhappy or want you to spend more time with them? Maybe it was as simple as wanting you to talk to them more and share thoughts and experiences about their day. When this stops happening your partner will feel more and more distant towards you and will feel like their only option is to end things.

They Suspected You Of Cheating

You may be completely innocent and your ex’s paranoia is unfounded, but that doesn’t mean that they weren’t worried about you cheating. Think back to things that your ex may have said to you. Were they getting suspicious of you staying out late? Did they continually check your phone or read your emails? Maybe they were asking you questions about who this new friend was on your Facebook account.

Your ex could have been the jealous or paranoid type, but did you do enough to allay their fears? Did you both have different ideas about what constituted cheating? Maybe this was a constant point of contention between you both. If you thought that flirting with the opposite sex was a harmless bit of fun, your ex could have felt the opposite. 

Flirting with someone else in front of your ex can be pretty soul destroying for them and make them feel kind of pathetic and unwanted. Maybe your ex was the sensitive type and you did not see what kind of damage your behaviour was doing to them. It could be possible that your ex broke up with you because they thought that you just didn’t care about their feelings. Be honest with yourself here, did you give your ex any reason to doubt you? 

They Didn’t See A Future With You

Sometimes, when the fun has gone out of a relationship and the honeymoon has passed, you begin to wonder how compatible you are with your partner. Maybe their foibles are now starting to grate on you and you find it difficult to be with them for prolonged periods of time. It takes time to see the real person. You have probably heard that love is blind and that is certainly the case up until a certain point. When the smoke clears and reality kicks in. 

Ask yourself were you and your partner compatible? Did you have the same ideas about things and life in general? Did you ever talk about the future? When realism kicks in, your ex probably thought to themselves that you were too different to make things work. Your future together could have looked fraught with problems and complications and they got frightened. They thought that the best course of action for you both was to nip things in the bud sooner rather than later.

Also, were you both on the same path? Maybe you were both on different wavelengths and your ideas about the future were incompatible. They might have seen your relationship as only temporary and you were more long term thinking. Perhaps they were only after a bit of fun or waiting until someone better came along. It is hard to hear that this could be the case, try to be honest with yourself though so that you can get to the crux of the matter and start to fix things.

Think back to what your ex said to you before they dumped you. When you brought up conversations about the future, did your ex get nervous and not really want to talk about it? Did they give you the brush off? This is a good sign that they were already thinking about calling it a day. If your partner cannot see a future with you then it a big sign that things will quickly go downhill.

There Is Someone Else

This is probably the last thing that you want to hear right now. As if breaking up wasn’t hard enough, you now have to deal with the fact that there is someone else on the scene. Were you suspicious of this before the break up? Maybe your ex was giveing off signals that they likes someone else. 

Think back to how your ex acted or what your ex said to you before they dumped you. It is likely that they said something that made you second guess yourself. Were they always busy, trying to hide their phone from you, always going out with their friends? Maybe your ex didn’t cheat on you at all, it could be that they just had their eye on someone else for a long time and these feelings became impossible to ignore. 

If you do think that there is someone else then there is not much that you can do about it right now but accept it and be patient. There are ways to get your ex back if they are seeing someone else, but these do not involve pouring your heart out to your ex and pleading on them to choose you instead. You have to bide your time and make your ex realise that they have made a mistake. There are things that you can be doing in the background to speed up this realisation and make them see you as a potential partner again though.

They Did It Out Of Anger

Arguments can bring out the worst in people. They can turn into slanging matches where each person tries to outdo the other in terms of how much they hurt you. If your relationship was fraught with these kinds of arguments some things may have been said that really affected the other person. Maybe they are still hurting over something that you said in the heat of the moment. Maybe they are holding it against you and are secretly resentful and angry towards you. If this is the case, they could have thought that the best way to get back at you was to break up with you – give you a taste of your own medicine so to speak.

There are loads of couples that break up for this reason. Things can quickly escalate and get out of control. Their feelings for you are still intact and the love that drew you together is still bubbling under the surface. Remember that there is a thin line between love and hate. There is passion between you both and that is a good sign.

There is some good news if this was the real reason why your ex decided to end things. They did it on the spur of the moment without thinking things through. As the dust settles and they start to think about the consequences of their decision, they will soon realise that they have made a huge error in judgement. We all say and do things when we are emotional,  that does not necessarily imply that we really mean them. Your ex is probably ashamed of themselves right now and doesn’t know how to rectify the situation. If this is the case then it is important that you give them some time and space. Let the anger dissipate and allow your ex to come to their senses.

You Were Too Controlling And Jealous

People rarely realise that they are controlling and that their jealousy is having a negative impact on the one that they love. They think that they are only showing their partner how much they care about them by caring who they speak to etc. Your ex probably viewed this very differently. Did they tell you that they needed some space or to stop being so paranoid? This was them trying to warn you that your behaviour was worrying them slightly. 

Have you ever been accused of being a jealous or controlling person by friends or previous partners? If so then you have to take their accusations at face value and do some soul searching. Admitting that you are these things is incredibly difficult but it needn’t be the end for you and your ex. You just have to learn how to control yourself and honestly ask yourself if you had any justifiable reasons for being jealous. If you did then this relationship was probably not for you, if you cannot trust your partner then this will only spell disaster for you further down the road.

When you are jealous and controlling there is usually a root cause for it. Perhaps you have low self esteem and you think that no one will stay with you for long periods of time. Maybe your past relationships have taught you never to trust anyone. Whatever the reasons for your jealousy, you have to fix them before you can proceed with a new relationship or fix your old one. Ask yourself if you have been carrying old issues through to your relationship with your ex. When you deal with the real issues and let your ex know that you have, getting back together will be possible.

They Are Confused – Don’t Know What They Want

Sometimes relationships undergo a kind of hiatus period. If your ex was distracted during the last stages of your relationship, or seemed as if something was on their minds, then it is a big bet that they were confused. Your ex may have tried to talk about their confusion with you, but couldn’t really explain what was going on in their heads – something just didn’t feel right. Maybe you felt this too, was your relationship in peril at the last and everything that you did or said was taken out of context?

When your ex needs to work out what they really want, they might suggest a break or even a break up. This does not necessarily mean then end for you both though, it could just be that they need the space to realise that they cannot do without you. When you are always with someone, you can lose your sense of identity and you might become confused about who you really are. This could be all that it is and your ex need to figure this out on their own.

It might be a good idea to try and sit down with your ex and talk things through about why they are confused. Never get emotional if you decide to do this, be prepared that your ex may say things that you don’t want to hear. You have to be the mature one though and show them that they can talk to you and that they have nothing to fear from you. Tell them that you don’t want to push them and you understand that they don’t know what they want. They will respect you a lot more for doing this. That does not mean that you have to be a doormat either and just allow your ex to treat you whatever way they please.  

You should never try to force them into coming around to your way of thinking if they are confused. The only way that they will be able to work things out is on their own and at their own pace. Trying to convince someone that they should be with you will never work and may end up making your ex resent you even more. Give them some space and you could have them back before you know it. 

Things Were Moving Too Fast

It is normal to get carried away in a new relationship, you might have only been together for a few weeks and you find yourself talking about marriage a mortgage and babies. Your whole life suddenly seems like it has been planned out for you and you feel a bit trapped. If you both have gotten swept away in the romance of the honeymoon period of your relationship, that is completely normal. Be prepared that the reality could have set in for your ex before it did with you. This sudden talk of commitment and a life of changing nappies may have lost its initial luster for them. 

Were you coming on too strong and your ex suddenly did a 180 on you as a result? Maybe their behaviour radically changed at the mention of moving in together. Think back about what you might have said or suggested that caused this change in your ex. If they felt pressurised into taking things a step further when they were not ready it might have backfired on you. The only way that they felt that they could be free was to end things.

We all move at different paces in relationships, so if you just assumed that they were ready for the next stage when you were, this was a big mistake. There are ways that you can rectify this though and show your ex that you don’t come on too strong. Don’t stifle them, give them space and show them that you can be patient with them if they need it.

They Stopped Admiring/Respecting You

This is a huge sign that you are going to break up or going to be dumped. The reason that someone falls for you in the first place is because they have admired you from afar or have a great deal of respect for you as a person. They have an ideal that might not be based in reality. They have made assumptions about you before they have even gotten to know you and they have an idealised version of who you really are. Once they get to know you more this admiration could wane.

Of course this is not your fault – you cannot necessarily control what your ex saw in you or pretend to be anything that you are not just to please them. You have to look at things a little more deeply though to be able to discern if your ex suddenly started seeing you differently as time went on. 

At the start of relationships we tend to make more of an effort to try to appeal to someone and gain their interest. We put the best possible side of us forwards and work on every aspect of ourselves to try and attract this person. This does not happen as time goes on. We become complacent and a bit lazy about retaining the interest of our partners. I am not saying that you have to put on a show and pretend that you are someone else to keep someone, but you shouldn’t let things slide completely if you want to maintain a happy relationship.

Things change, there is no doubt about that, we all settle into the different phases of a relationship. Maybe some of your less appealing treats come to the fore and your ex started to forget what they once found attractive about you. What you have to do now is to try to pinpoint what your ex saw in you in those early stages of the relationship. You are still that person deep down, you just got lost along the way. It will come back to you if you work at it and in the process you will begin to feel a lot better about yourself too. Your ex will see this change in you too and it will reignite any old feelings that are buried in their hearts for you. You have to be patient though, it will not happen overnight.

For Guys

Learn how to make your ex girlfriend crave you like she once did, even if she is already going out with a new guy, even if it has been months since the break up and even if she is refusing to talk to you. There are proven psychological techniques that you can implement today to make your ex girlfriend regret the break up and start seeing you as desirable and attractive again.

Matt Huston will go into depth about becoming the guy that she first loved again with his audio and pdf system. Tap into her mind and learn why she is acting the way she is towards you. These techniques work and have been very successful in getting back thousands of ex girlfriends all over the world.

Click here to find out all about the Ex2 System.

Listen to the testimonials from men who have already used this system below.

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For Girls


Matt Huston will show you how to get your ex boyfriend to chase you again without being obvious or using guilt-trip style behaviour. Once you understand male psychology you will know exactly what you have been doing wrong up until now and be able to rectify your mistakes.

He will teach you what guys desire in a girlfriend and how to make him see you like he once did. These are proven techniques that you can start using today to make your ex boyfriend want you again. No matter how bad your situation is right now, or the reasons for your break up, Huston will teach you how to reverse his attitude towards you.

Click here to find out about Get Him Back Forever.

Listen to the testimonials from women who have already used this system below.

Testimonial 1        Testimonial 2         Testimonial 3      Testimonial 4